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August 2005
Directors Report
The White Wreath Association - Action Against Suicide has introduced a fundraising week called "Sock-It-To-Suicide" the event will be held yearly, in the first week of October, Monday to Friday. This year it will be held between 3rd & 7th October 2005.
Holding the event involves schools, workplaces etc to wear (self supplied) coloured socks or stockings to school/workplace during the week, and making a donation of a gold coin for this privilege.
As you are aware mental illness is shockingly common, affecting almost every Australian family directly or indirectly. It can strike a child, a brother, a grandparent or a co-worker. It can strike someone of any background. It can strike at any stage of life, from childhood to old age. No community is unaffected, no school or workplace untouched.
The White Wreath Association -Action Against Suicide is saying and doing things which no other group or organisation is doing in relation to preventing suicide. We welcome you to access our website www.whitewreath.com for further information.
We are a voluntary organisation. The main aim of the association is to raise sufficient funds to build centres (Safehavens) for those in need. We believe that people who are suicidal need immediate access to inpatient care or a place of safety. This is not happening at the present time.
We would greatly appreciate your support so if you can help in anyway or would like further information please contact Head Office.
Kindest Regards
Fanita Clark
President
Thankyou's
Index Self-Storage, Zupps Hillcrest-Roger Farrell, Browns Plains Hotel, Mainfreight-Steve Fare Brisbane & Tony Diery Perth, Dockside Comedy Bar - Anthony Patching Kangaroo Point, Ford Performance Racing Team - Melbourne Vic, South Burnett Youth Investment Program, City Motors West Perth - Chris Marwick, Holden Ltd WA Zone-Sales and Marketing Office Perth WA, Perth City Council, Commodore Richard Shalders CSN, RAN Senior Naval Officer Western Australia, The Hon Sue Ellery MLC Parliamentary Secretary to the Minister of Health W.A, Don Sonsee St John Ambulance W.A, Rt Rev Brian Kyme Episcopal Assist to the Archbishop, Life Savers Perth W.A, Salvation Army Perth W.A, John Lam Sydney NSW, Volunteer Small Equipment Grant 2005, Quota South Brisbane Qld, Gavin Bird Qld, Merle Hammill Qld,
TO ALL OUR VOLUNTEER BRANCH CO-ORDINATORS AUSTRALIA WIDE. YOU DID A MAGNIFICENT JOB IN HELPING US BRING TO THE ATTENTION OF ALL - ACTION AGAINST SUICIDE.
(Their summaries are included in newsletter however as newsletter information is collated many weeks before distribution we were unable to receive all reports this time.)
Emails
5 April 2005 Mt Gambier SA Two and a half years ago I lost my close friends to suicide and 6 months later I saved my best friend from it. I don't know how I have pulled through all this time and stayed strong, it has been one of the hardest things that I have had to deal with! Over the past two and a half years since I lost my friend, I have had suicidal thoughts myself, but with the help of my best friend -R****- I have realised that I can't leave her behind. She is the only thing keeping me here and I guess in a way I have her to thank for my life….I just don't know how I have made it this far as we have only been best friends for a short time and before that I had every intention of "Leaving" I'm not sure whether R**** knows how I feel about this, one day I will thank her!
20 April 2005 Unknown It is now 9 months since my Brother in law hung himself. I am once again up at 3am not able to sleep and thinking of him... and thinking of the pain my husband feels...They were more than brothers they were best friends and workmates (Such a hole he now has in his life) The loss I feel, makes me angry and want to cry and am just confused. I cannot imagine what my in-laws and husband feel. You see I only knew him for 18 months. People like me. The sister in law that only knew him for a short time should not be affected 12 months on Right….****WRONG**** It still hurts and still is hard every single day...But I think I am expected to put on a brave face..(Why do we try to do what is expected) To all of us that look at the people who have lost someone to suicide...1 2 or 10 years on and think they are coping well...Don't be fooled...Even if we knew them for a short time or didn't really know them that well. Knowing someone who has suicided is knowing a pain that will never go away. We all learn to do what is expected. Suicide affects us all. Even the neighbour or the man in the butcher shop. I have just found that the ones they expect to still be upset. The family that is close. They avoid the issue and make small talk about something else. But for me the one who should be OK...They need to talk about it (and they do)...We all need to talk about it...We all need to find the answers...Till next time it is now 4.35am.
4 May 2005 Australia D M G passed away 11 March 2004 Dearly loved and sadly missed by your children - N******, A***** and M*******. We all loved you dad and still do. You will be in our hearts and memories forever. See you one day in heaven. Love T**** xoxoxoxoxo
17 May 2005 Utah USA I have formed a very close bond with an Australian family. Recently our daughter took her life and our close friends had heard of the good work you do and referred me to your Website. I found it very comforting reading other peoples stories and yet saddened at the same time that these terrible tragedies are happening everywhere. I praise you for bringing this subject out into the open and letting people know and understand the dilemma families go through. May God be with you all and keep up the good work.
17 May 2005 South Australia My dad committed suicide 7 years ago now, I miss him so much. I still don't know why….So many questions and words were left unspoken, I didn't even get to say good-bye. I would really like to commend this site; I think it's fantastic. I know I am not alone, and I do feel for everyone else that's a suicide victim, by heart is with you all. I find it really hard to talk about, well I don't talk about it, I feel so angry inside, so many thoughts run though my mind…. Did he really love us to leave us hurting like this? The pain is too great; will I ever get over this?? I really really miss my dad, I was 16 when it happened, I do think about him every day. I love you dad, even if I didn't get to say it as often as I should have. Rest in peace.
18 May 2005 Queensland I wasn't sure where to start. Did I email my personal story of child abuse, leading to inefficient self-taught life copying skills, which I've now learned to refer to in their true sense as life saving cover up skills. Did I recount taking my life at 16 and then again at 44. "Taking my life" is the term I use now to explain - I had no intention of verbalizing my thoughts. I wanted no intervention. Having been revived, and spending merely 2 days in intensive care, in the most recent event. I was merely told "we can fix your body, but there is a 12 month waiting list to fix your brain"….."Please sign here". Thereby accepting responsibility for your discharge"…."do you need us to call a taxi". I now laugh and cry at the thought that such a dimwitted, and uneducated comment would be made to a patient in my state. I've spent over 30 years educating myself, and others who will listen on the issues of depression, suicide and lack of mental health resources. I've helped teenagers, adults and families understand the issues, and how to help. Due to lack of funds, after losing my entire life savings, at the hands of a dangerously, manipulating and mentally ill relative I can no longer afford membership etc. or I would be an active member of your Association. I've found the way I can help effectively, and at no cost to me, except a little of my time. I share my life and counsel others who are still suffering via one of the Depression/Mental Health online support sites. I've never been so humbled or satisfied in my life. I've replaced a family that believed your worth is judged by your achievements, with friends that love, support and guide each other to improved well-being. I've faced my abuser to find he is merely an insecure, arrogant and lost individual who has no control over my life anymore. I have not exposed him, as he is my brother and I don't want his family to suffer his sad and pathetic past. I have a message for parents/adults/carers that needs to be heeded. PLEASE don't fob off a child, no matter how old, with an attitude of denial and avoidance if they find the strength to express their experiences of incest. "Oh all kids play doctors and nurses" or "no it didn`t happen or I would have known" is not a good response when the age difference is 11 years between the abuser and victim or at any time for that matter. To VALIDATE means to accept that the persons' thoughts and feelings are being accepted and could have foundation. I'll always be happy to bullet point signs and symptoms anyone needs on how to identify a victim or sexual abuse or depression. I would dearly love to become qualified so I could be accepted as "knowledgeable" when it comes to mental health care and do my part to change our archaic systems, but I simply can't afford it at present, and I'm deemed too old at 45 to be suitable as a trainee. I have been an energetic and successful Business Proprietor and a Business Development Officer, yet society has decided if I mention in my resume that I support mental health, am 45, yet don't come with the formal qualification to justify their selection criteria I'm unsuitable for employment. On the other hand potential employers have advised me I'm too experienced and we can't accept that someone would write the truth on a resume saying, "I revel in the belief that to have a job is a privilege". You see my recovery only came about when I stopped hiding the true me and decided honesty and being totally open would serve me best. This way I can survive and it has nearly totally ridded me of the suicidal ideation I carried for 35 years. I hope it's ok if I make a white wreath of my own this year and use it to continue my individual quest for justice, improved support systems and the right to be honest, without prejudice. I receive no government benefits, funding or support. I've used the last of my funds to buy my medication, health care and general living expenses. No, I'm not looking for any form of sympathy, I'm merely saying, don't take anyone for granted or label. I'm not what most expect to see. I could live next door and you wouldn't recognize me. Empathy is key. If you can help reach the hearts, minds and policies of this world you will be helping me. Mental illness strikes all ages, races and professions. I take accountability for my actions; I'm just saddened by so many reactions. I thank you for your dedication and send my love to all that have loved and lost. Please don`t be sad. Peace comes in the longevity of our love. C
21 May 2005 W.A I wanted to let you know people care. I am a Mental Health Consumer Representative. I sit on many committees/working parties representing those in the community who suffer from mental illness. Sadly many many times people come to me whose family member has suicided had no history of mental illness. We ALL need to make an effort to get the message out there that there is HELP available. I am preaching to the converted on this site but we must all try every day in every way to be a voice for our "lost" and for someone else who may become lost without telling someone they need help. We lose more of our young people to suicide than to car accidents. How quick the governments are to do all they can to prevent accidents but WHAT are they really doing to prevent suicide.
22 May 2005 Adelaide S.A Our only son elected to leave this world on 1st February 2005. Close in our hearts he will always stay. Loved and remembered every day. Love you son RIP
24 May 2005 Gladstone Missing you all the time M****…Mwah
27 May 2005 Mt Gambier I want to say thank you to everyone in Mount Gambier for everything you have done for all the families that have had this done to them. Thank you so much!!! All the best for the years to come.
27 May 2005 Perth WA I heard about this on Triple JJJ on my way home tonight. So tomorrow I will be laying a wreath for two of my oldest friends S*** and Joanne who have been away for nearly a year. You would think time would heal the hurt but it doesn't. You think that it only happens to other people, and you can become attached from the reports in the paper, TV, radio on statistics and tragedies and grief and suffering because IT DOESN'T HAPPEN TO ME. Well guess what, it does in some way the curse, the black dog, the scourge will make its mark. It thrives on alienation and social malaise; the silence from authorities feeds this disease. It eats your soul, a dark churning void where once used to be the connection between friend and friend, no white no glow just a sickening sorrow. You want to remember but you want to forget. I love you both and I hate you both and I will cry for you because you have to start to heal somehow I suppose.
28 May 2005 Rockingham WA Thank you to the White Wreath I have been unable to really mourn my 21-year-old daughter since she died 3 years ago today. I am going to the White Wreath Ceremony in Canberra today to be with others that maybe able to understand what I feel. My B***** was a beautiful girl and no one really knows why she felt she had to leave this world. I love her like she was still here. I have two other daughters who have both tried to commit suicide and really don't know how to help them either. Now that I know about White Wreath Day I hope I can have a day to grieve when I don't feel like I have must hide it. I know it is hard for others to understand but they really must learn that we are just people who have lost someone we loved dearly and are constantly hurting inside. We feel guilt and shame and sorrow and sadness and so many things…please, just reach out to us and let us know that you care and that it's alright to talk about our daughters or loved ones. Don't make us bottle up all our feelings and feel ashamed of talking about them. I love you B***. Always will…your Mum
1 June 2005 Brisbane gidday J*** and D***, just a quick gidday. Guys I was thinking after Sunday which was a wonderful day about the possibility of holding a tax deductible national door knock appeal annually to get the much needed funds in each capital city for the counseling houses. It would only be a few phone calls to see if white wreath could hold such an event and if so it is a fair bit of organising in each state to each suburb. We collect annually for leukemia foundation and it is amazing how people open their hearts and donate and also white wreath would also be educating the public about the organisation and also awareness. This was proven on Sunday when the sound lady at the end of the Kingaroy service opened up and said she wasn't aware of such an organisation.and from that day on I feel she will heal. All the speeches on this day were very touching and I feel this video could go to parliament and any other video around Australia to touch there hearts and listen also this email could go to parliament because before Sundays service I felt how lucky I am not to have had this disease affect my own children but now after the service I learnt I am not a lucky parent this could affect me as a parent any time any day because it is a hidden disease. Love R** and K****.
2 July 2005 Gold Coast Qld My brother suicided 3 years ago. My mother came across a group from White Wreath the first year after he died and was so impressed with what you are doing. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
Wish List
A4 Envelopes
DL Envelopes
Copy Paper
Paper Clips
Volunteers Australia/wide (contact our Head Office for details)
OR YOU MAY LIKE TO DONATE
Via our credit card facility posted on our Website www.whitewreath.com then follow the instruction.
Directly/Direct Transfer into any Westpac Bank Account Name White Wreath Association Inc
BSB No 034-109 Account No 19-9741
Cheque/Money Order to White Wreath Association Inc and mailed to PO Box 1078 Browns Plains Qld 4118
WE ARE ASKED ON MANY OCCASIONS FROM UNIVERSITY STUDENTS FOR OUR INPUT IN HELPING
THEM IN ESSAYS/THESIS'S THEY ARE DOING.
THE FOLLOWING IS RECENT REQUESTS OF QUESTIONS AND OUR ANSWERS
COMPILED BY PETER NEAME RESEARCH OFFICER OF WWA AND FANITA CLARK PRESIDENT
We thought we would share with you some of these to hopefully give you a better
understanding of what the White Wreath Association is all about.
INTERVIEW QUESTIONS
To Whom It May Concern,
My name is M D; I was raised in Mount Gambier but am now studying journalism at RMIT in Melbourne.
As a part of my course I am required to write a news story in my local area and I was wondering if you would be able to answer some questions for me on behalf of your association.
I am writing my story on the resignation of the remaining two mental health nurses in Mount Gambier and how their leaving will affect mental health services locally.
What are the White Wreath's feelings towards the alarming shortage of mental health services in Mount Gambier and rural South Australia?
What do you feel needs to be done in regards to adequate care of mental health sufferers in areas where little to no services are available?
Patients in Mt Gambier who require treatment for their illness must now be flown to Adelaide; do you feel this acceptable procedure?
Your reply would be greatly appreciated.
Regards
M D
REPLY
Dear M
We are concerned about "Mental Health" throughout Australia and we give our 100% support to efforts to regain and retain a "Mental Health Service in Mt Gambier".
Suicide/Mental Health is one of Australia leading causes of death and we estimate that the true rate of suicide is at least 4 times the official figure. Many of these deaths are preventable by admitting the patient early and assessing them over time.
To this affect we have made the following 8 Recommendations to the "Mental Health Inquiry" Senate Select Committee on Mental Health.
RECOMMENDATIONS IN ORDER OF PRIORITY
White Wreath has cut back the number of recommendations to only those that are essential to both save lives and improve mental health immediately. So much has been said about mental health locally, nationally and internationally. There have been literally thousands of enquiries and tens of thousands of preventable deaths, but the objective evidence is that mental health care for the 3% of the population who are seriously mentally ill is worse than at any time in 250 years - any time in Australia's history.
All suicidal people, that is people who say they are suicidal, whose friends, relatives and carers say they are suicidal or those who indulge in acts that are self-harming, attempted suicide or self destruction be immediately admitted, compulsorily if necessary, to hospital for a period of no less than three months. Explanation: - This one provision would save at least 3,000 lives per year.
That Psychiatry becomes a branch of Neurology - Mental Health Assessment should be neurologically grounded. Verbal assessments lead to thousands of deaths per year. Assessments are worse than at any time in the last 250 years.
Any professional who refuses a patient care and that patient subsequently suicides, commits murder or serious offence must be named and charged with murder, manslaughter, arson etc., whatever the subsequent disaster.
Those mental health professionals are given immediate training in the neurology of mental illness.
That all professionals be trained in how to assess people for suicide, murder and violence.
That all people no matter where they present i.e. at Court for anti social behavior and violence, at Family Services for "dysfunctional behavior" at the Family Court and especially all those who are subject to Domestic Violence Orders be assessed for suicide, murder and violence.
That only Mental Health Nurses and Psychiatrists with a minimum of 5000 hours direct patient contact with the mentally ill be responsible for training Mental Health Professionals and for the care and management of mentally ill people.
A return to a three-year on the job Mental Health Nurse Training Program with separate registration.
Feminist studies and social engineering witchcraft and sorcery have replaced a minimum standard of clinical hours experience so much so that the training in Mental Health of both doctors and nurses is the worst in the world.
Note: We have not mentioned the need for more beds, money or more resources and manpower because if individual professionals get frontline assessment right then these services will automatically follow the increased demand. At present resources have been taken from the Mental Health Services to bolster the doubling of the prison population and the massive increase throughout the Court system. Lawyers, judges and prisons get money that should be spent on the Mental Health System.
If you wish to read the full submission please go to our Website www.whitewreath.com and click on the menu bar at the top of the front page on "Correspondence" The submission is 17 pages and the Mental Health Inquiry
closed on the 28 April 2005.
If you have any more queries please do not hesitate in getting back in touch with us.
Kindest regards
Fanita Clark
President
QUESTION
Perth WA Curious as to why suicide is considered synonymous with mental illness in the press release - I'm not convinced that the issues are that closely related that one equals the other & can be interchanged so generally. The recent suicide of Crowded House's drummer was reported to be due to a relationship breakdown & depression but more recent reports state that neither was the case & it's impossible to know the cause without a note left behind.
Also, there are so many speakers but it's not obvious as to who will address the issue of Aboriginal deaths in custody…?
CP
REPLY
Dear CP
Thank you for taking the time in reading our information and the following is our reply to your concerns:-
The briefest answer is:-
1." Suicide is caused by neurological problems leading to low serotonin commonly referred to as a mental illness."
Suicide /mental illness runs in families and if you look through the family tree you will find suicide, nervous breakdowns and mental illness somewhere in the family.
We refer you to Page 11 of our submission to the Senate Select Committee on Mental Health 26 April 2005 posted on our website www.whitewreath.com
Suicide is not a romantic "Cry for Help" it is the result of a serious mental illness and maybe the first warning signs of serious mental illness.
It's preventable if we admit and treat mentally ill people early in the development of their illness. This is no longer possible because of the mass closure of medium and long-term mental health beds. There should be 70,000 medium and long-term mental health beds in Australia; there are no medium or long-term beds. (In 1960 with a population of 10.1 million Australia had 35,000 beds)
The question you posed is a good one and is answered throughout our Website specifically in our latest newsletter May 2005 and our suicide guidelines. These are all available through our Website.
Mental illness affects the structure, function and chemistry of the brain and without immediate admission suicidal people will eventually complete the job because drug treatment only affects the chemistry. Talk therapy/counseling does not prevent suicide.
People naturally look for external stress relationships, abuse reasons for suicide. If stress caused suicide we would all be dead.
2. Aboriginal deaths in custody:-
The majority of aboriginal deaths from suicide occur in the community and this is solely due to lack of rapid access to mental health facilities and we refer you again to Page 10 and 11 of our submission April 26 2005 where we talk about a 17 year old boy.
If you feel you have any more questions please do not hesitate in getting back in touch with us.
Kindest regards
Fanita Clark
President
INTERVIEW QUESTIONS
Griffith University Student from Columbia South America
Why do you think the Federal Government has delayed releasing suicide statistics over the past few years?
We get lots of these questions. Sometimes we feel that we are doing your assignment for you so the first thing we want you to do is acknowledge White Wreath in your work.
Governments throughout the centuries have never really known what to do about suicide statistics because they are essentially news. Therefore, slow delayed release of suicide figures happen all over the world and the media go along with this as well. Therefore, it is less of a conspiracy and more a natural reaction to negative news. What could be worse than someone who you are close to taking their own life; society, government, everything we do is about improving and enjoying life, taking your own life destroys the basic faith or life force which the Greeks refer to as "Eros". They also had a word for taking your own life or taking someone else's life and that is "Thanatos" or death force.
Have you noticed within your organisation that suicide cases had increased?
Suicide figures fluctuate from year to year, season to season, and we have noticed for hundreds of years for them to be up during springtime. In our opinion, and suicide statistics prove this, suicide has increased dramatically over the last 25 years solely due to the closure of mental hospitals. The bed rate in 1960 was 32,000 beds or 300 beds per thousand population when the population then was 10.1 million. Now the population of Australia is 20 million and there are no medium and long-term mental health beds when there should be 70,000. Suicide is caused by mental illness; mental illness is purely biological in origin.
What are the most common ages of a person committing suicide, I am aware that it happens to anyone and all ages, but do you have any age range?
Youth suicide gets a lot of publicity but the most common ages is 70 plus people but because there is less people in this age group it gets a lot less publicity. Statistically the most common age group in numbers of people is 25 to 40. These are figures off the top of our head you will have to go to Australian Bureau of Statistics to get the figures yourself.
Do you think that the Government is hiding this alarming issue to the Australian public?
This question gets asked a lot. Both media and government have a Heads of Agreement policy not to publise suicide. Therefore, both government and media are equally to blame. Suicide bombers get tons of publicity and it has no affect on the suicide rate however what authorities base their concerns on is that suicidal people will copy "Successful Suicides". For eg there maybe a spate of people jumping in front of trains, jumping off buildings, but hanging has remained the most common form of suicide in males and females for thousands of years and suicide rates have been noted to rise in Spring time for thousands of years. Averaged out the suicide rate is roughly the same everywhere. Suicide is caused by neurological problems leading to low serotonin commonly referred to as a mental illness.
Have you ever contacted any Federal Government employee asking for statistics on suicide?
Yes, we get the figures and you can access these figures too from www.abs.gov.au Causes of Death Ref 3303.0. Bear in mind official figures are probably only a quarter of the true suicide/ mental health related deaths per year. Our estimation is in excess of 8,0000 people per year.
Do you receive any economic support from the Federal Government?
No.
What do you think is the first thing Government should do to prevent suicide?
The first thing that should be done is early intervention. Early intervention means rapid admission to hospital or place of safety and assessment over a minimum period of three months. Sixty Minutes on 5 June 2005 showed many examples of tragedies that happen, loss of life as a direct result of failure to admit early, refusal to treat and too early discharge.
It is too easy to blame the "system" ipso facto the government, but the government or any ministers do not treat, refuse to treat, poorly assess and discharge too rapidly suicidal/mentally ill people. Health professionals must accept some of the blame and be accountable for their actions. The training of health professionals has changed and moved away from treating the seriously mentally ill, the only group who commit suicide, to the worried well. Thus even though there is more knowledge, more technology and better drugs for treating mental illness clinical standards have deteriorated.
Would you be able to share a real case of suicide with me?
Read our "Guest Book Signings" & "newsletters. Included are current and up to date true-life stories from relatives who have tragically lost loved ones by these tragic means.
How often do you receive notifications of suicides and when was the last one?
Daily.
When was this organisation founded and why?
The White Wreath Association - Action Against Suicide was formed because of my own personal tragedy.
On the 29th May 1999 we received a phone call from the Police informing us that our son was involved in a serious accident and can we please come home as soon as possible. At that point in time I froze, I couldn't breathe, and I became numb. Instantly thoughts rushed through my mind that our son was involved in a car accident and was a paraplegic, quadriplegic or was in a coma. I never imagined for one moment what we were about to find out.
The sad fact prior to this day is that our son was diagnosed five and a half months earlier with mental illness and during this period he tried twice TO KILL HIMSELF in one day. First by connecting a hose to the exhaust pipe of his car the second by taking an overdose of prescribed medication. Even after HIS attempted suicide our son was not taken seriously by the medical profession and we as a family had to endure lack of services, lack of cooperation between the medical profession BECAUSE OF THE CONFIDIENTIALITY LAW and no understanding by the general community. The medical profession treated me his mother as though I was paranoid and schizophrenic. They did not want to know our opinion or knowledge of our son's condition and did not want us involved even though my son was 19 and living at home with his family. Our son become very aggressive and angry to the point I as his mother was becoming afraid of him. I felt very ashamed of these feelings but we had to cope in SILENCE AS WE WERE ALONE and left to fend for ourselves and cope the best way we could.
FOR ALL OF THESE REASONS OUR son Jason aged 19 finally lost all hope AND LAID HIMSELF ON A TRAIN TRACK.
Hence the formation of the White Wreath Association - Action Against Suicide.
What is your main message to young people?
Suicide/self harm and extreme self destructive behaviour is not normal and can lead to death.
Anyone who shows this behaviour needs urgent inpatient care and treatment.
Community care simply does not work there is no other life threatening medically condition where people would be routinely refused care.
Kindest regards
Fanita Clark
President
Queensland My name is K… and I am a student at Griffith University studying the Graduate Certificate in Suicide Prevention who has become aware of your organisation through an article in this week's Logan West Leader and through visiting your Website.
I find what you are doing very commendable and also very heartening from a personal point of view of being someone with a psychiatric disability who once longed for somewhere other than the hospital emergency department to go for safety when times got rough.
As another coincidence as well - and this is quite amazing - it so happens that I am currently working on an assignment for university course that involves investigating the prevention strategies that exist in my area (I live at G…. and would never have known about White Wreath had I not glanced at the local paper this afternoon!)... I was wondering if you have heard of or know about the organisation affiliated with our University which is known as the Australian Institute for Suicide Research and Prevention or AISRAP http://www.gu.edu.au/school/psy/aisrap/ it being perhaps that they might be interested in the work you are doing (I am only a 1st year student so I can't really speak for them)
Sincerely,
K.
Melb Vic I have been prompted to write today - 19th May - as it should be my Father's Birthday, instead it is a sad reminder of years I could have and should have had his love and guidance in my life.
My father committed suicide in December 2003 - the same year that I immigrated to Australia. My sister (who was had already been living in Australia for 5 years) and I, both went home for his funeral.
It was a huge affair with over 600 people present (he had been the headmaster of a private boy's school for many years) and at the "tea" that we had after the service - I was touched by the feeling that while everyone was saying what a tragedy it was and how shocked they were to hear of his death; all I could think about, was that this was always the way it was going to be. My father had suffered from a breakdown and then depression for several years before his suicide and I always felt that instead of the tragedy and shock they should be saying what a relief it was and that at least he was now finally at peace and that his death was a release of his mental pain and anguish.
I have been to the funerals of cancer patients and they all sound the same really - about what a brave fight had been fought and how much respect the victims were shown for their courage and yet I knew that my Father's fight had been every bit as painful and his anguish had been every bit as real as anyone suffering from a disease that you can see from the outside.
In my heart I know that suicide was always the way it was going to be and that he is now finally at peace. It is my own pain that I have to deal with everyday as I wish that I could speak to him just one more time and remind him how much I love him. I wish that he could see my beautiful daughters who were just 3 and 5 at the time of his death and now are 15 and 18 and have been cheated out of a loving grandfather.
On this day - 19 May - I wish that I could hear his voice so that I could wish him a Happy Day and remind him how very much he is loved and missed.
WL
Dear Members,
I work with White Wreath as an Accountant based in NSW.
Our church has a collection during the four weeks of lent, where all monies placed in a small box goes to charity.
After I handed ours in at the church, I thought of the four tins Fanita once sent me for a fundraiser.
I now have one of these tins in my kitchen where the family throws in all its small change, the other one is located at our local Police Station, (where my daughter works as a police officer) which has people going through 24 hrs a day.
Fanita has told me she has 100's of these tins available;
"SO PLEASE DEAR MEMBERS GIVE HER A CALL, GET A TINNY, AND GIVE WWA AN EXTRA HAND".
Thank you
Mary Wydmuch.
OUTCOME OF THE "TH" CASE
The Hon Stephen Bracks
Premier
Dear Premier
Please find below email that was sent to us by TH and which we have notified you previously of our concerns regarding his mental health state.
In our opinion the only safe response is immediate admission into hospital.
In my particular case my son on several occasions talked of taking his life and repeatedly was ignored by the medical profession as crying wolf until finally he laid himself on a train track five and a half months after his first diagnosis.
"Fanita, I was told today by my case worker that I would not be admitted to the unit no matter what and if I suicide then that is unfortunate. So I have no support at all so I am going to suicide today I need some peace and this is the only way I can get it.
TH
Ms Fanita Clark
President
White Wreath Association Inc
white.wreath@bigpond.com
Dear Ms Clark
CALL FOR HELP? MR T H
Thank you for your email to the Premier of 31 March 2005 concerning a call for help you received from a Mr. T H. The Premier has asked me to reply on his behalf. I note that you have also forwarded Mr H's correspondence to the Minister for Community Services, the Hon Cherryl Gambit, MP and the Director of Mental Health Victoria, Dr Ruth Vine.
Upon receipt of your correspondence contact was made with Dr Vine's office with the assurance given that Mr. H had been contacted and received immediate attention on the day. The Department of Human Services are
monitoring Mr. H's care needs.
It is also important to note that when you provide personal and health information about other individuals, this Department relies on you to make them aware that such information has been given to the Department.
Thank you again for writing to the Premier.
Yours sincerely
MARTINE BOLDING
Manager
Ministerial Correspondence Unit This Department, in accordance with the
Public Records Act 1973, will collect and store the information you have
provided. Should you have any queries regarding access to your personal
information held by this Department please contact the Privacy Officer,
Department of Premier & Cabinet, Level 2, 1 Treasury Place, East Melbourne
3002.
FOOTNOTE FROM THE PRESIDENT:- WE HAVE TH'S FULL PERMISSION IN WRITING TO ACT ON HIS BEHALF IN ANY WAY WE SEE FIT TO FIND APPROPRIATE AND IMMEDIATE HELP FOR HIS MENTAL HEALTH.
TO MEMBERS OF THE WHITE WREATH ASSSOCIATION INC
OUR STORY
My son Felix was 16 ½ years when he tragically shot himself, leaving an enormous hole in our lives with so many unanswered questions. He was a wonderful son, a quiet boy, courteous, hard working but he loved his cricket and athletics. The hardest thing to understand is why he never confided in anyone about how he was feeling, not even his best mates at school. He obviously had some sort of depression that had started to manifest itself in the latter half of his 15th year but he was able to mask it in some way, even from his family. He was our only son, and excelled in operating the machines on the property and that was what he loved the most about being on the land. He was becoming an expert at driving all the machinery we had, dozers, graders, front end loaders and yet seemed unaware of the special gift that had been bestowed upon him from an early age.
My son had been in boarding school from the age of 12years but it wasn't until Grade 10 that we noticed he started to become moody and depressed especially after the holidays when he had to go back to the school, yet back in school everything settled down or so it seemed on the outside. It was then we sat down with him and told him that if anything at all seemed too much for him he must confide in us as we were always here for him. His school marks never showed there was a problem looming that was slowly eating away inside him. At school he worked diligently, was popular, ate well, slept well and had fun like normal teenagers do when they are with mates. At the commencement of Year 11, he didn't want to go back to school but when we discussed, as concerned families do, that to finish senior would be of benefit to him, he relented and never argued with us.
Felix had just gone through a tough mid-term exam in mid 2003 and was almost relieved to be home for the holidays. But coming home he seemed to have the weight of the world on his shoulders and became almost intentionally withdrawn from me, especially avoiding physical contact to the point of becoming aggressive, which I found disturbing. Concerned, I assumed he was going through a stage of growing up and this was his way of breaking his bond with his mother and getting closer to his father. As parents we did not even consider depression let alone suicide as we had brought both our children up knowing that if anything bothered them our lines of communication were always be open. We often had forums of discussion around the dinner table as our children were growing up and there were other relatives such as grandparents and aunts, just a phone call away, which were also close to our children.
During the three weeks at home I noticed there was something that had changed with his personality but when I tried to ask him about it he brushed it off and didn't want to talk about it. My son was struggling with dark thoughts but wouldn't let anyone in to help him.
On the 15th July, the day he was to return to boarding school with his sister, I had decided it was time to contact a counsellor on our return to the school to see if there was something I could do for him. It was breaking my heart to seem him so down.
That morning he had half packed his bag but took off without saying anything and did not leave a note or letter to explain the actions that led to his death. We found him after searching for 5 hours, that afternoon and from that day on our lives changed forever.
The most tragic thing to come out of this is that he could've been helped through this if only he had opened up to someone or if we had been aware of the possibility that depression is very common in teenagers. It is ironic that parents and teachers spend the most time with children yet they aren't they being taught to recognise the signs and symptoms of depression and mental illnesses.
When the school found out that he had taken his life, they kicked into a self-preservation mode where the information about his death was kept under wraps. Not even his closest friends were told of his actions, they had only been told of a `farm accident'. Isn't it ironic that the students are expected to become more mature, to handle adult life as they progress to their senior years yet they are not allowed to be told the truth about what happens in real life. They are treated like children, that shouldn't know the awful truth because most of the schools are concerned that if you mention the word, `suicide' you could put that thought into their head and they may cause them to do it. How ill informed society is about suicide!
It is high time the education system realised that the only way to fight this `insipid killer' that lurks inside the minds of many of our hormonally, chemically imbalanced, depressed youth making them capable of snapping at any moment when they feel there is nothing left to do everyone around them, like a ripple effect in a pond - and change them forever- is to talk about it openly.
When Felix died I searched for answers and for many months researched everything I could find about depression and suicide and then took it upon myself to write his story in all the local papers around our area as there had been a number of teenage suicides occurring and the local media had taken on the role of bringing this to public attention. I felt by telling my story someone else may be experiencing the same problem with their son or daughter. (It did help someone.) I also wrote to the teachers of his school to make them aware of how my son died, as I know for a fact that they were not told of the truth either.
Since Felix's death the school has implemented the `blues' program in their system and some of the other schools in the town have also taken up the fight against suicide by making available information on depression in adolescent and how it can lead to suicide.
The education system needs to be aware of the `blue' period that our youth can go through especially in these demanding stressful times that society imposes on us now.
As parents we have to live with this burden for the rest of our lives and it seems just as the pain subsides something in the conscience will trigger a memory and then all that pain comes flooding back making it a constant battle to maintain a positive outlook on life and the future.
The truth is, I found that this does happen to those children that are cherished and loved by their families and that they are supportive, loving and competent parents who are deeply affected and scarred by the actions of their suffering children. But act impulsively and affect the lives of.
Emma Goldman Quo 1890 to 1917
"The most violent element in society is ignorance"
ANNUAL GENERAL MEETING
Dear Member
The Annual General Meeting of the White Wreath Association Inc - Action Against Suicide will be held on Monday evening, 3rd October 2005 at the Brown Plains Hotel Function Room, Browns Plains Road, BROWNS PLAINS, QLD commencing at 7 p.m. at which all positions on the Committee will be declared vacant.
You are invited to attend and, if interested, nominate for any of the positions on the Executive Committee or as a Sub-Committee member.
Below is a postal nomination form, which should be returned to reach the office five days prior to the meeting.
We look forward to seeing you there and thank you for your continuing support.
Yours faithfully
Committee - White Wreath Association Inc
"
I wish to nominate for the position of President/Secretary/Treasurer/Sub-committee member.
Name: __________________________________________________________________________
Address: __________________________________________________________________________
___________________________________________________________________________
Please complete and return to WWA Office at PO Box
BROWNS PLAINS QLD 4118 no later than 19th September 2005.